Half of a Whole Lot is still A Lot

Wednesday, September 4, 2002

McDonald’s will introduce a lower-fat french fry. That it’s been all over the news today indicates two things:

1. Today has been a slow news day.

2. Press releases work.

The only interesting thing about this story is that it reminds me of something I remember Moby (of all people) saying on Dennis Miller’s HBO show. The subject of the show was Fast Food and Moby’s a vocal vegan / animal right advocate — that’s the connection. When asked what he thought the future of fast food was, Moby predicted that within twenty-five years they’d all serve nothing but vegan food. Why? Because the people of the future would be smarter consumers (what with those brain implants and flying cars) and, anyway, fast food chains would prefer avoiding lawsuits such as those currently in the courts.

Moby’s “thing,” it seems, is taking other people’s ideas and running with them, kind of misinterpreting them along the way — so don’t readjust your investment portfolio quite yet. But I think he’s got the right idea. Fast food will become healthier in the coming years. But only as an afterthought — taste and marketing must remain the foremost concerns.

So I say: Continue avoiding McDonald’s. And fast food in general.

Thanks for your time. Transcripts of this speech will be handed out at the exits.